Are all men assholes? I want you to know that I’m writing this out of anger and frustration. More and more I’m finding that most men are in some way assholes. Sometimes I am…often I am. I know my brother in law Ben is (he’s told me so).
I’m a church planter, a minister, a missionary…so I’m not sure I can write this blog. But lets just consider it similar to Jesus’ clearing of the temple (except his motives are insanely pure and mine quite possibly are never that way…and I’m not God…and I can’t grow a beard).
I’m not really thinking of all men, but more specifically of married men. Treat your wives with some respect, ok? Remember that you’re insainly lucky to be married, to be loved by a woman, to have a companion for life. Remember that, although I’ve never seen you naked, your body is gross and your wife is doing you a favor by thinking that you’re hot stuff.
I’m a minister, I shouldn’t be writing this right?
So all you married bloggers out there, Ryan, Jonathan, Jason, Jonathan, James, and all you others out there…be nice. Don’t be a jerk. Remember that you’re lucky. I won’t go into my long list of men who treat their wives like crap (there are so many more appropriate words here that I will avoid), but trust me when I say that the list is staggeringly long. It’s depressing, it’s sad, it’s horrific.
So lets end that horrible epidemic now ok? I’ll give it a shot and so should you.
Musings From The Ground Up
Initiating a new grassroots movement in downtown Vancouver
I thought I was a jerk? Thanks for the update! I will work on it. My 14th anniversary is coming up.peace.
Yep, I'm crazy lucky. What hacks me off is that I'll often treat friends better than I treat my wife. Where do I get off acting like that? She is my world, I'm working on treating her like I have her best interest, not mine, at heart.
Wow, thanks for calling me out. I know I'm a jerk and I totally married up. I try to recognize that by saying "thank you" all the time. "Thank you for doing the dishes." "Thank you for working a job you hate so I can go to grad school." "Thank you for putting up with me." You get the idea.
my evil gossip side wants to know what happened to spark such a reaction! I'll be content to take the rebuke and kiss my wife lovingly today.
I was wondering why my wife wanted me to look at this! So maybe she is hinting at something, I dont know.
I believe (nay, I know) this post has to do with me. That is all I'm saying. I don't know what to say from the wife perspective… maybe that you aren't as bad as you think you are, but still… work on it
if you get to cuss… then so do i…if men are assholes, women are bitches.i know this, cause i am one. i think that those of us blessed enough to be a spouse need to treat our gift from God better, in general. i know i do.and generally, when i'm nice to the mister? i mean really nice? the kind of nice that makes my pride cramp all up? it pays off.
Yeah, I don't know that it's just men. People are jerks. Some are jerkier than others, but people–all people–need to be reminded to be nice from time to time. Ryan, I'm glad you're the kind of man who gets outraged when someone gets mistreated. I'm glad you feel strongly enough about it to broadcast a call for more consideration. And I'm glad my friend Jess is married to a man who wants to be something better than what is generally accepted as okay.
I can only speak from my personal experience. It very well could be that you women may or may not deserve to be called names. But in my experience with my wife, she is pretty much the most perfect thing I could ask for.It's just that I keep getting reminded of how off centered men can get. They get caught up in the world, in making money, and in their fantasies (I'm not saying that women do not, but I'm not a woman so I won't speak for them). Our society likes to let men off the hook. It's normal for men to go to strip clubs, to rubberneck at women, to be workaholics, etc. Our society says that men will be men…and so those mentalities destroy our familys, destroy our children, etc. Men need to stop being jerks and start puting first things first.
Well said. I am not intending to call my husband names. I am only stating that what you said was well put. I know I need to be more like Jesus and I fail miserably. I remember reading that husbands have to work on the "love" side of life, whereas, wives need to respect/support their husbands…In that case, men could look jerkier to others when both actually are failing at their duties. Let's all give some love.
I want to defend my husband by saying that he loves, respects, cherishes, and provides in the most perfect way any husband could. If anyone in our marriage is a jerk, its me. I am the moody, tempermental, and crazy one of the relationship. He has never at anytime make me feel that I am not the only woman he would ever want to look at, and he never tells me of other woman he thinks are hot, even if i ask. And his first priority under God is me, and there is no other feeling greater than knowing I am that important in someones life. So Ry, I do agree that society lets men off the hook and make men look selfish and like pigs and i thinks its unfair to you guys. Because there are some pretty great guys out there who understand the importance of their wives and know where to put their priorities. (unless its the World Cup, then priorities may get shifted in some cases.)
I always knew that I like rolo. Sure he made me live in a rats nest, but his heart was always pure.
whatever, at least he doesn't set his friends on fire.
rebecca marie and gina are right . . . we are bitches too sometimes. this post you wrote reminded me to treat my husband better — so thank you! today, he made be breakfast and set out my lunch while i got ready for work (i was running late). i remembered to tell him thank you . . . but i was also cranky at him today too . . .he really is the best thing in my life.
Hey ladies, if you need a real man, I'm your guy. Just look at my picture! I'm Raj VanAllen, Bitches!