I tell my wife everything. I have absolutely no secrets from my wife. None. When people confide in my about serious things and they say “don’t tell anyone.” I always reply with “I tell my wife everything. So I’ll tell my wife, but I won’t tell anyone else ok?”

Well apparently this was a one sided agreement. For my wife is not being true to our “agreement”. She’s keeping secrets. R1 and Jess have some sort of code that they’ve kept secret from me. When they talk on messenger they always start off with The Code so that I can’t trick R1 anymore into thinking that I’m my wife. (Ok, so maybe sometimes I’d talk to R1 under my wifes login and R1 would think she was talking to Jess when in reality she was talking to Jess’ awesome husband.) So naturally I ordered my wife to tell me the code based upon our marriage vows that said we’d keep no secrets unless they were related to a gift or a surprise party/date of some sort. But she refused. She refused to tell me her secret. She chose R1 over me. Ouch.

Well guess what? Guess who’s got a secret that he’s not sharing with his wife now? If you want to know my secret feel free to email me and I’ll tell you…that is, unless you’re my wife or my wifes coded buddy friend. My secrets a good one too. It’s juicy and very very secretive.