It’s official! I’ve finally got my bachelors degree! Ok, I actually graduated quite a few years ago, but up until today I had yet to receive my diploma. There was some mix up and my diploma got lost. They said I needed to pay $5 to order a new one. I said that I already paid for my diploma and I didn’t want to pay for another. And so the stalemate has sat…for three years…until today. Today I gathered the cash together and bought my diploma back.
So now, for the first time, I’ve got my diploma in my hand.
Anyone want to throw me a party?

(the great irony is as I’m writing this email I realized that I still haven’t opened the envelope to look at my diploma. For all I know it’s written out to Melvin Buckmeyer or Popeye Straws)