Category Archives: movies

Charlie Korsmo Vs. Ben Savage

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Remember Charlie Korsmo? Does the name ring a bell? Oh, you cannot forget little Jack in the movie Hook can you? How about Dick Tracy or What About Bob? The kid was cute as kittens (yes, I did just type that) and was supposed to win the Oscar for his Hook performance. Instead Gene Hackman won the coveted best supporting actor award for his work in Unforgiven (as a side note, umm, remember Curly from City Slickers? Yeah, he won best supporting actor the year before. Something is wrong with America) But little Charlie has not been seen or heard from since his performance in Can’t Hardly Wait back in ’98. All in all, despite his acting prowess Charlie was only in a total of seven movies.

Ben Savage was known for his work in Boy Meets World. While he garnered significantly more film and television roles he was really only known because of his seven year run as Corey on Boy Meets World and as the real life younger brother of Fred Savage from the Wonder Years. Oh Ben, you and Topanga were the perfect couple and I in no way felt awkward watching your love develop through your post-pubescent years.

Today Ben and Charlie find themselves as bitter enemies. Why? Why, you might ask? Well Charlie graduated from Yale law school and spends his time fighting for the Republican party while Ben graduated from Stanford University and for a period of time was an intern to Arlen Specter the well known Democrat. While they are brothers when it comes to the childhood acting ring, the are bitter enemies when it comes to their adult responsibilities. Ben drinks Sprite while Charlie drinks rootbeer. Charlies likes to ski while Ben snowboards. They have become the bitterest of enemies despite their amazing similarities.

The exciting reality is that it will all come down to a fight, a fight to the death, a fight to celebrity death. My money is on Charlie. While he didn’t really get the ladies, he does have sword fighting experience, not to mention the fact that he’s friends with Thudbutt who has that killer roll thing he does. That’s the one rule I live my life by, never bet against a dude who has a friend who can curl himself up into an impenetrable ball and roll around and knock people (including, but not limited to pirates) over.

Why Romantic Comedies are as bad as Porn

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Yeah I said it. I know its on everyones mind and someone was just waiting for it to be said. Romantic comedies are as bad as porn. Let me give you a few reasons why:

  1. They Objectify Women- Like pornography romantic comedies objectify women in a terrible way. Porn trains people to value women only for their bodies. In porn you do not see women as people of value, worth, intellect, etc. but instead see them as a sexual toy to be played with for your own pleasure. In romantic comedies women are seen in their most base form of flower-needing, romance-loving, and relationship-driven people. Romantic comedies do not recognize that women do not always fall for Matthew Mcconaughey, and that some women actually value brains over amazingly good looks (I like to view myself as  perfect combo of both).
  2. They  Create Painful Fantasy- In my opinion one of the greatest problems with pornography is that it brings expectations into marriage that are based in fantasy. People see things in porn that they then expect to get in their relationship with a spouse (or significant other). They fail to recognize that what they have seen in porn is fictitious and in no way represents a genuine healthy sexual relationship. You end up having guys expecting fantasy from their wives, which when undelivered leaves the men unsatisfied and wanting more. Similarly romantic comedies create for women a fantasy of a guy who buys the girl flowers and goes to elaborate lengths to win the girl back after he’s said something stupid. It makes women believe that guys can be both good looking, thoughtful, funny, smart, and creative. Romantic comedies lead women to believe that prostitutes and maids can actually get together with rich guys, that people from the past can come to the future, that you can fall in love after three hours, and that a kiss defines true love. Fantasy. Fictitious.
  3. They Have Very Poor Stories- I won’t even go into detail about story lines connected with pornography. But come on! There’s enough money in the porn industry for you to at least create a quality story around your fantasy! I mean come on! And those romantic comedies aren’t any better! You pretend to be the finance of some stranger that nearly got hit buy a train and then you fall in love with his awkward brother? Or how about that other classic storyline where your son flys to New York all by himself in order to meet up with the future woman of your dreams that he only knows through a letter. Or how about that one story line where the clutz lady cop has to join a beauty padgent (wasn’t there a sequal to this one?). Come on! How much money do these movies make? Can’t you write some good story lines?
  4. They are Cesspools for Abuse- Listen to some of the stories from women who have left the porn industry and you’ll hear stories of the darkness associate with that industry. It’s terrible and actually, now that I’m writing this blog it doesn’t seem appropriate to make jokes about. Just know that I had some good parallels to “abuse” in romantic comedies (like pairing Anne Heche with Harrison Ford, keeping Meg Ryan’s career alive, etc.)

I think the point has been made. While I’m sure there are many other points that could be added to show the similarity…nay, the identical nature of porn and romantic comedies, I hope that this will be a strong enough message to keep you off the drug of bad movies…both with nudity and cheesy romance.