Category Archives: Ryan’s mind

Hate that is socially acceptable

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Any Christ follower should profess that it’s unhealthy and unChristlike to hate. Hate is destructive. Hate is the opposite of love.

Since childhood we have been trained that it is socially acceptable to hate certain peoples.My son has bought into it and already preaches it as true, and the reality is that you probably do too.

Think about the movies we watch. Think about the heroes we cheer for. It often guises itself as justice, but in the end it is really just justified hate. My son believes that it’s acceptable for a hero to kill a bad guy. In his dreams (literal dreams) fire breathing clocks destroy bad guys while the good guys stay far enough away from the first to stay safe. Bad guys die while good guys hopefully go free. When good guys die it’s a tragedy, when the bad guys die it’s justice. Bad guys deserve to suffer good guys deserve to destroy the bad guys. Both the hero’s and the villains kill, its just that the heros kill the right people while the villains kill the wrong people.

What an interesting line we’ve drawn too! Who decides who’s bad and who’s good? Those lines were easily distinguished when I was a child. But as I grow older I’m finding that the good guys do terrible things and the bad guys sometimes do good things. Was Steve McNair a good guy or a bad guy? Was my grandpa a good guy or a bad guy? It all depends on perspective doesn’t it? Last week Steve McNair was a good guy. This week he’s a bad guy. Was Martin Luther King Jr. a good guy or a bad guy? He had affairs, doesn’t that make him a bad guy? And yet his death is a tragedy. Oh how the lines are blurry!

As a follower of Christ I see him coming alongside the “bad guys” of his day and calling the “good guys” names. As a follower of Christ I hope that I can help to reshape my and my sons view of who is deserving of death, of what justice looks like, and of how I can love my neighbor (as a side note, in the Good Samaritan story Jesus teaches us that our neighbor includes our enemies). While there is always a need for consequences, I wonder if we’ve forgotten how much we have been forgiven and have instead begun to call our neighbors accounts payable…hmm…I think Jesus told a story about this…

peace.

Living Green on a Small Budget

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For those of you who make green living a political issue, an issue including lines between democrats and republicans…stop. That’s ridiculous. I don’t care if global warming is a hoax. I don’t care if carbon footprints are a joke. I don’t really care because it doesn’t matter. It shouldn’t matter. Because regardless of what’s happening in our environment shouldn’t we all want more economical cars? Should we all want to be free of oil? Should we all want new and better technology? Shouldn’t we all want to keep landfills as empty as possible? Shouldn’t we all want to take care of our earth (come on Christians, this directive came straight from God)? So, here are a few suggestions that my wife and I have done to make less waste, spend less money, and get chemicals out of our home.

  • Garbage bags- You’ve bought all those cloth bags to lug your groceries home, but everytime you go to the store you forget them! So what do you do? You use plastic. Well, we stopped buying garbage bags for our kitchen and bathroom garbage cans. Instead we use those extra plastic bags from the grocery store. Free. Recycled. The only major negative is that you’re emptying the garbage can at least once a day.
  • Chickens- Yup, that’s right. Chickens. We didn’t want to compost ’cause we don’t have any leafy/grassy waste. So instead we bought a handful of chicks for a couple bucks a piece. Now that they’re full grown chickens we get four organic and free range eggs a day (from four chickens), we give the chickens all of our old food (obviously aside from meats and fats), my kids get an invaluable lesson concerning nature, and they’re incredibly easy to maintain! Oh, and yes we do live in the city. And yes most cities allow you to have around five chickens (not roosters).
  • Worms- We did worm composting for a while. It was exciting for a while, they were like my own little pets. But eventually I got tired of the upkeep. If you could do your worm composting outside it would be much easier. I’ve written past blogs on worm composting so feel free to read those in order to understand more of what goes into this project. In the end it was a fun experiment that produced a great boost for our garden this year. Oh, and it’s cheap too! Dirt is free or cheap. Worms are like $20. And you can use many free containers that you’ll find in your garage (I converted a rubbermaid tub).
  • Vinegar and Baking soda- These two are your lifesavers. They will keep you from spending an obscene amount of money on cleaning supplies. Using vinegar and baking soda you can clean nearly anything. And the best news? They’re super cheap!
  • Recycling- Duh. If you don’t recycle as much as you possible can…start! For a while my wife and I lived in an apartment complex that paid for recycling but refused to allow or set up bins for pickup. The irony is that these apartments were run by the city…and yet they refused to allow recycling! At one point we even had the garbage/recycling people come down to our apartments to walk the managers through the process and then set it all up…the managers refused! Anyway, we had to save our recycling things and then load them up in the car and drive to a local collection agency. It sucked.
  • Glass jars instead of tupperware- Start buying up mason jars at garage sales and use those for your storage containers instead of tupperware. This keeps those chemicals from leaching into your food through the plastic. Even better is to use old peanut butter, jelly, and pickle jars as your storage containers. Free, recycled, and better for you.
  • Plastic containers- I know that I just said that plastic is the devil, but if you’re going to use it at least make use of old sour cream, cottage cheese, and other plastic containers. It’s free!
  • Trader Joes- I used to write off TJ’s as a hyped up grocery store that just offered goods for yuppies. Turns out they have some great healthy food at a fraction of the price. Sounds like a good commercial right?
  • Water Bottles- Stop buying individual bottled water! It’s is incredibly bad for your wallet and incredibly bad for the environment. Just don’t do it! If you have a compulsion with water buy yourself an expensive sigg bottle so that you can find joy in your water drinking. But don’t buy evian, aquafina, or Sierra! The water in those bottles have been tested…and guess what? It’s tap water!
  • Rain barrel- I’m not sold on rain barrels yet. We’ve got one. It’s amazing how fast it fills up too. In one small rainfall our 55 gallon barrel filled up in just a few hours. We made the mistake, however, of not setting it up high enough so as to create quality water pressure. Here’s my question, the barrel I bought were food grade barrels filled with soy sauce. So before it’s ready for your use you’ve got to rinse it out a few times. Thats right. In order to save water with your rain barrel you’ve got to rinse it out a few times…rinse it out…with water…to save water…see the idiocy in this? I think if you use rain barrels long term it makes more sense. But it is cheap, and it’s kind of fun to set up, and it makes the neighbor kids ask lots of questions!

I feel like I should write some more about natural pesticides for your garden (a garden would have been a great thing to put on the list too!), avoiding the use of ziplocks and paper products, getting rid of your microwave, non-toxic paints, some creative artistic things for the kids, etc. I’m sure y’all have lots you could add to the discussion as well.

What an exiting thing it is to think creativly about how we can take care of this beautiful gift that God has given us.

Why Romantic Comedies are as bad as Porn

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Yeah I said it. I know its on everyones mind and someone was just waiting for it to be said. Romantic comedies are as bad as porn. Let me give you a few reasons why:

  1. They Objectify Women- Like pornography romantic comedies objectify women in a terrible way. Porn trains people to value women only for their bodies. In porn you do not see women as people of value, worth, intellect, etc. but instead see them as a sexual toy to be played with for your own pleasure. In romantic comedies women are seen in their most base form of flower-needing, romance-loving, and relationship-driven people. Romantic comedies do not recognize that women do not always fall for Matthew Mcconaughey, and that some women actually value brains over amazingly good looks (I like to view myself as  perfect combo of both).
  2. They  Create Painful Fantasy- In my opinion one of the greatest problems with pornography is that it brings expectations into marriage that are based in fantasy. People see things in porn that they then expect to get in their relationship with a spouse (or significant other). They fail to recognize that what they have seen in porn is fictitious and in no way represents a genuine healthy sexual relationship. You end up having guys expecting fantasy from their wives, which when undelivered leaves the men unsatisfied and wanting more. Similarly romantic comedies create for women a fantasy of a guy who buys the girl flowers and goes to elaborate lengths to win the girl back after he’s said something stupid. It makes women believe that guys can be both good looking, thoughtful, funny, smart, and creative. Romantic comedies lead women to believe that prostitutes and maids can actually get together with rich guys, that people from the past can come to the future, that you can fall in love after three hours, and that a kiss defines true love. Fantasy. Fictitious.
  3. They Have Very Poor Stories- I won’t even go into detail about story lines connected with pornography. But come on! There’s enough money in the porn industry for you to at least create a quality story around your fantasy! I mean come on! And those romantic comedies aren’t any better! You pretend to be the finance of some stranger that nearly got hit buy a train and then you fall in love with his awkward brother? Or how about that other classic storyline where your son flys to New York all by himself in order to meet up with the future woman of your dreams that he only knows through a letter. Or how about that one story line where the clutz lady cop has to join a beauty padgent (wasn’t there a sequal to this one?). Come on! How much money do these movies make? Can’t you write some good story lines?
  4. They are Cesspools for Abuse- Listen to some of the stories from women who have left the porn industry and you’ll hear stories of the darkness associate with that industry. It’s terrible and actually, now that I’m writing this blog it doesn’t seem appropriate to make jokes about. Just know that I had some good parallels to “abuse” in romantic comedies (like pairing Anne Heche with Harrison Ford, keeping Meg Ryan’s career alive, etc.)

I think the point has been made. While I’m sure there are many other points that could be added to show the similarity…nay, the identical nature of porn and romantic comedies, I hope that this will be a strong enough message to keep you off the drug of bad movies…both with nudity and cheesy romance.

Reflections on a Few Years of Church Planting Cont.

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James posted this response to Tuesday’s blog
Do you want to say more about the transition from just doing a really good job of doing church to living missionally with the unchurched? That is a journey I need to take.
Here’s the best I can do for a response right now, though I know that there are many of you out there who could answer with much more wisdom, experience, and practical insight.
The transition from being good church people to being whatever you want to call us now took a strong willingness to slow down our life, take a step out from normalacy, and a willingness to change our posture.
Slowing down is important because it’s near impossible to see God within our family if we’re too busy let alone see him at work in my neighbor. Stepping out of whatever I consider to be normal for myself is important because we won’t meet people who need Jesus by hanging out in our same circles (this is more true for paid ministerial staff and life long churchy folks). And our posture is crucially important because it, more than most else, shows people how we’re different. My experience at my local coffee shop is a perfect one. I was there for a month before I ever got to know a soul (aside from one barista who was a Christian). I would go in, order my coffee, and go to the secluded part of the shop where I was nearly in a room by myself, and then I’d plant my face in a book or computer for three hours. Eventually I realized that I needed to step out. So I started sitting in the front area where I was constantly getting distracted by people coming in and out. Then I started changing my posture. I faced the door, I looked up showed that I was paying attention when I was eavsdropping into someone elses conversation. Then, finally, I started interupting and making myself a part of the dialogue. After doing those few things I found it near impossible to get any “work” done because I knew too many people, there was too much going on, and I’d spend a whole morning talking to strangers. It also challenged me as someone who loves to accomplish things. I had to decide to give up some things, to not acomplish some things, and to not be nearly as productive.
So here’s a whole pile of unsorted thoughts…The reality is that the only people that work according to our scheduled work times are the “good churchy folks”. Everyone else doesn’t give a damn about the fact that you’re supposed to go to church on Sundays, be a part of a small group on Wednesdays, etc. It took a willingness to sacrifice more of our time than we desired because opportunities to spend time with people who need Jesus did not happen planned out or at easy moments. Inevitably it was when we were rushing and trying to get our house clean for our home community that a valuable conversation happened with a neighbor. And it’s not that four years ago I wouldn’t have been willing to have a conversation with my neighbor (shoot I would have been ecstatic to be able to talk to my neighbors!) rather four years ago I wouldn’t have stopped cleaning the house to go get the mail when I saw my neighbor chilin’ outside. Four years ago I wouldn’t have stepped out in order to meet that person.
I don’t know if any of this has helped or clarified. If I had to narrow it down to the single greatest challenge to all of this as a minister it would be the idea of redefining success. Programs look better, they fill newsletters better, they often create more buzz and excitement but for the most part they are not the type of success that we’re called to achieve (that last line doesn’t sit with me well ’cause it feels like it’s describing peoples spiritual journey as a measure of my success…which it is not! I hope y’all understand what I’m getting at with that line.) You end up feeling like you might be wasting your time a lot ’cause your not being productive. But my guess is that in the beginning it will feel like more of a choice that by the end will become second nature.
Anyone else have wisdom greater than my own that they’d like to share?
What an exciting gift it is to be able to journey with Jesus in all of this.
peace.

Are you God?

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I won’t deceive you and say that this blog has not been grown through my current book addiction in some ways, but if we were honest how many of our thoughts are completely original anyways!

The Jewish, Christian, and Muslim faith are unique in that they believe in one God. Monotheism. Pretty exciting stuff right? Well in our western world (though times are changing) anything but monotheism was considered foreign, strange, and maybe even foolish. It was all those “other” places in the world that had many different gods, we are Christians and follow one God, THE God.

But here’s the reality, while we may have said that we follow one God our actions speak otherwise. You see when there are many gods you end up with a god of the river and a god of wine and a god of food and a god of sex and a god of the underworld, etc. Much time, then, is spent pleasing all the gods of the pantheon or at the very least trying not to piss them off. Whereas when there is just one God, wine and food and sex and…all belong under the same roof. They don’t all submit to different lords but rather are all submissive to the one Lord of the universe. Right? Are you drooling with excitement yet? ‘Cause here’s the part that I think is exciting…

I think many people who call themselves Christians actually do not believe in one God. Here’s the thing, if there is just one God and he is God over everything then when we call ourselves followers of this one God we must believe that we are called to submit all of our life to him. While I do believe that there is much room for our sinfulness and all that crap that comes along with being human, a dissociation has grown between much of what we call ourselves and what we consider our spiritual selves. It’s for this reason that Christians justify racial hatred, grotesque materialism, apathy toward social injustices, and greed. It has become two different worlds. It’s this odd dissociation that makes it possible for someone to proudly say “Yes I am a Christian and yes I hate colored people” (though they often find more offensive terms to use). In other words it has become normal and acceptable to believe in a god that has nothing to say about how you operate outside of church walls. This is not monotheism. “God” actually becomes some sort of pluralistic view in which there is the God of the Bible and then there is the god of my own preference.

What would it look like if we began to submit ourselves more consistently, more holistically to a God that is truly supreme, lord over everything, and creator of all? I wonder if this would change our preference concerning individuality over community, spending over giving, sex over relationship, drunkeness over honesty (often I think that peoples reasons for getting drunk is that it allows them a sort of freedom that their sober self won’t allow), busyness over simplicity, preference over sacrifice…